Thursday, 24 April 2008

I once thought that it was a strange thing to do, to help someone unconditionally, especially when your role in that person´s life is unclear or unflattering (abandoned former lover, for example). And by help I mean really help, to pay for food, lodging, entertainment, to provide constant emotional support, to think about the well-being of that person every waking moment. But as I have said before it has never felt strange, helping The Ex-Girlfriend, though it seems it appears strange to other people.

In any case it may not be that strange at all when compared with continuing to help someone when being close to that person may result in you suffering considerable harm or even death.

I do not believe the chances of such disappointing climaxes, such let-downs, occuring are high. Any threat that may exist I prefer to think of as exaggeration, girlish hysteria. Any potential bringers of harm are merely bogeymen and phantoms.

Bad things, I generally believe, will not happen to me.

Though they might. A bad thing, namely death, has already happened to two people close to The Ex-Girlfriend (though neither of these deaths were remotely her fault). And isn´t this the strangest thing of all? That I know such things might happen, but tell myself and everyone I know that they won´t? You´re crazy, I scoff whenever anyone tells me I might be in danger.

I think this way for a number of reasons:

1. It has been almost a month since the events in that other place that have led to The Ex-Girlfriend coming here. If a bad thing was going to happen, it probably would have happened by now. Wouldn´t it?

2. It is very very far from the other place to here.

3. No-one knows The Ex-Girlfriend is here (though a little aside which is perhaps amusing and perhaps not - The Ex-Girlfriend and I went to a football match here not long ago. The match was between a team from here and a team from there. We stood in the away supporters end of the stadium. There were not many away supporters. TV there was broadcasting the game live. And as we watched the game I imagined the TV cameras zooming in on the crowd, and especially The Ex-Girlfriend, who as previously noted is beautiful in all possible senses of the word. And I imagined then spines stiffening, fists clenching, eyes sharpening in recognition, there.

So that´s where she is!

Is this amusing, or not?

4. Bad things, I generally believe, will not happen to me.

That, I´m afraid, is all that I have.

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